Monday, November 23, 2009

Party in the front

I think I just got the worst haircut I've ever had in my life which is saying a lot because I'm about the least judgemental person when it comes to hair. I've never had a definitive idea of what it should look like and it usually likes doing whatever it wants anyway, so even if I tried to have a style, there's no guarantee my hair is going to allow it. For that reason, I've always been open to pretty much anything. My favourite line after getting it cut? Yeah. Yeah that's good. Whatever. It's lighter so I like it. This time, though, I'm a little more ashamed than I have been with other not-so-hot hairstyles.

My first clue should have been during the cut. As she got into it, I started to panic as I realized she was spending an awful lot of time cutting around at the back of my hair. Cutting the back? You just need to trim the back! Hello? Are you still cutting the back?! I had a brief flash that I was getting prepped for the Kate Gosselin look and my stomach sunk. I tried to steer her back on track and mentioned how thick my hair was and that it's nice when the sides are trimmed in accordance with the angled bob, too. She spent about 5 minutes adjusting that to whatever strange specifications she had in her brain and there you have it. Haircut complete. (The discussion during the haircut wasn't any better. She actually asked if Idle Husband and I were planning on having children any time soon. Ummmm what?!)

At first I thought it was fine. I blamed it's odd appearance on the fact that I desperately needed to wash it (what else is new) and maybe a little flatironing would help (it's helped in the past, afterall). Once I got home and ''styled" it, I realized something. One side is obviously longer than the other. Note the word obviously. Like, if I can spot it, shouldn't the hairdresser have caught that? But when I think of it, she never did measure them out with her hands (as they do).

Secondly, it's misshapen at the top and sides (read: poufy) and in the wrong proportions to my huge head. The resulting effect looks like a version of a mullet. A reverse mullet.

I'm sporting a reverse mullet. Seriously.

I don't know what was so hard about my request. I like that angled bob idea where it's shorter in the back and a bit longer in the front and that's what I described, even using my hands as a guide. Also my hair was already cut like that. I honestly only needed a trim just to freshen it up. So she only had to follow the guidelines already in place...didn't she? Maybe it's because I didn't specifically say trim. I just made the gesture and said the technical words...I really wish I would have said trim...

Well, on the bright side, it snowed on Saturday so now I can wear a touque everywhere at any time and not look as strange as I would if there wasn't a touque on my head.

My new winter hairdo. It's fashionably in season.

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