mushroom pie

This is not a recipe. Does that make sense? Like, if you want to make this, you're just gonna have to wing it. Put away your measuring cups and spoons and just go with your gut.

I really wanted to figure it out for you. I was honestly quite prepared to measure it out. But then I got doing it and I really didn't want to dirty a measuring cup for you guys. Does that make me a bad person? Insensitive? Thoughtless? Will you forgive me if I told you I at least dirtied the cheese grater for it (and I really really hate using the cheese grater just cuz I know I'll have to wash it later)?

Well, at any rate, you're just going to have to grow a pair, throw caution to the wind, and cross your fingers because I don't have measurements for you and I never will.

Because this, friends, is another Greek recipe. Yup. And I believe I've already told you at great lengths how nothing is ever measured and if it is, it's measured in a tea cup or a drinking glass. Perhaps I'm turning into a real Greek now...

Greek Mushroom Pie Method

1 package of puff pastry

mushrooms

any white cheese you desire (I've used mozzarella and saganaki cheese)

pepper

1 250 ml container (that's 1 cup to the non-metric) of whipping cream

Unthaw the puff pastry as directed on the package. Unfold and fit into a rectangular baking dish (I used a small one, but literally, you could use any dish you've got). You do not have to use all of the puff pastry. Just use what will fit in the dish you have and fold the edges to form a puff pastry container (if you will).

Wash mushrooms. Chop 'em, slice 'em, cube them, leave them whole for all I care, just make sure you've got enough to at least cover the bottom of the puff pastry cuz that's where they're going.

Grate up your cheese. I will give you a guesstimate of about a cup, but again, it's really going to depend on how large you're making this. Just top the mushrooms with enough cheese so they're (pretty much) covered.

Grind some pepper. Ha ha. That's a Greek joke. It's a euphemism for sex. Grind the pepper if you've got time and then put some pepper on your mushroom pie.

Pour the cream over the whole thing (keeping within the boundaries of your puff pastry). Greek mom used the whole thing, I used the whole thing (minus 3 tablespoons cuz I needed it for the caramel apples), but I really feel like you can get away with less if you were so inclined. It's a little sloppy (see visual above), but that's how it's supposed to be and it's kinda nice cuz the puff pastry crusts can then be dipped in aforementioned juices so you're never going to be eating just plain ol' pastry. Whatever. You decide. If you need some cream for something else, too, just use whatever's left over.

Bake at 350 for 30-35 minutes or until it smells amazing and has turned a nice golden colour.

And if you're wondering what to do with any leftover puff pastry dough, just make some awful looking/great tasting turnovers. Cut the dough into squares, spoon on the jam of your choice (I used fig), and fold over diagonally, pinching the edges shut. Bake at 350 for 15-20 minutes or until golden and flaky.

Dinner and dessert. Bam!

normal life greek joke

We ran out to Save-On Foods (almost our new favourite store) early Monday morning, because plan-ahead me forgot to buy evaporated milk for my pumpkin pie and didn't realize it until the day of -- a.k.a. halfway through making the actual pie. (Sidenote: Duh. The recipe was right on the can of pumpkin. I couldn't have just glanced at it? Seriously, me. Major eyeroll in my direction.)

So the evaporated milk happened to be in the same aisle as the Oxo bouillon cubes which Idle Husband noticed almost immediately.

Oxo doesn't really translate into any comparable English word but equates to a very rude "get out of here" in Greek. Fun fact!


In case you missed them, here are the others: first, second, third, fourth

Oh, drab Wednesday

Normal Life Greek Joke
Ok, I suppose this isn't really a "normal life" Greek joke, but I'm trying to throw out some random post-its I have laying around and it was on one of them. Hey, if I've forgotten it up till now, there's a chance I'll forget it forever if I throw the post-it away without mentioning it.

You've seen the movie The Golden Compass, right? You know, the one with Nicole Kidman and their souls (I guess you can call it) walk around in the form of an animal and there's talking polar bears? Ok, well, I'm hoping you have cuz otherwise this won't make a stitch of sense.

Anyhoo, there's a device in the movie called an alethiometer. Apparently this device tells the truth and only one person in the movie can decipher it. It's pretty damn important in the scheme of things. So we're watching the movie, and Idle Husband turns to me and says, elethiometer (note: it's said more like this than with an 'a' sound) is basically like saying idiotmeter because elethio is Greek for idiot.

the idiotmeter

So here's this important device that's supposed to be telling the truth about people, things, whatever, but it feels (even more) bogus (than it should) because it's secretly called an idiotmeter. I guess you can look at it two ways. The person reading it is an idiot or it only measures idiots. Either way it's pretty suspect.

On an unrelated note:
I guess there's a lot of buzz over Apple's new iPad, but I wasn't aware of it until IH complained about it.
Firstly, this is the WORST NAME OF A PRODUCT IN THE HISTORY OF PRODUCT NAMES EVER. Honestly, I really can't get over the word "pad." It makes me think of lady hygiene products and that's so not cool. (and I'm not the only one)
Secondly, it seems to be a large, awkward version of the iTouch. Features include turning it whichever way you want and it adjusts. Wow. That's, like, so, like, um...we've seen that before.
Thirdly (and kinda off topic), who the hell dresses Steve Jobs? Honestly. He makes a kazillion dollars (that's a guesstimation) and he can't afford a stylist? In what era has too-large-for-you washed denim jeans and a tucked in black turtleneck (who looks good in those?!) been the vogue thing to wear? I could get it if he were actually stuck in a decade -- hey, I'm Steve Jobs and bell bottoms work for my figure! -- but I just don't get this look. Just the fact that this guy, in his baggy washed denim jeans and terrible black turtleneck sells a product that seems to define the "cool hipster indie geek" persona is so super backward and weird to me. It's a cool product sold by an uncool man who's oddly accepted by all the cool kids. FYI: this wouldn't happen in any other situation except this one. Ever. Also, I'm not going to spend that much money on an electronic gadget before first dressing myself. And that should really be everyone's motto.

For interests sake:
I'm going to start using Jay Leno as a way to describe someone who gives you something and then later wants it back.
possible usage: "You want that picture back?! You're such a Jay Leno!!"
I'm already using Jim Belushi as an expletive.
actual event: [after banging my finger between the wall and the vacuum cleaner] "Jim Belushi!!" (it's really important to emphasize the Jim part)

Normal life Greek Joke

#2

We were in Blockbuster the other day, when Idle Husband spotted these chocolate bars.

Theobroma, in Greek, means 'god awful stench' which makes this chocolate bar really appetizing, doesn't it?

We were going to buy it and try it, but our movie selections weren't available and it felt weird to be going to Blockbuster just to purchase a chocolate bar. I'm sure we will some day. If we're brave enough.

Normal life Greek Joke

I thought I might start a wee series of these. Idle Husband is originally from Greece, so every once in a while he'll come across a Greek word that we use commonly that just happens to translate hilariously in english. It hasn't happened that often, but when it does, we can't get enough of it.

#1

Oxi Clean. Oxi (pronounced 'oh-hee' in Greek) means 'no.' So something that we've come to understand as "this gets your stuff clean" actually means 'no clean' to Idle Husband. It's really hard to look beyond the 'no clean' thing now that I know.